I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
