You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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