Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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