been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
