so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Randomize
