Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
