Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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