I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
is it fun? or sober?
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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