look no pants
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
