if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize
