Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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