Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
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