Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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