You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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