So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
