No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize