At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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