when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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