coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
the liver wants what the liver wants
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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