How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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