I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
