The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
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