He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
