One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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