I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
