Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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