i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
