does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
