Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
