dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He felt like a one man threesome
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
