i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
