There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
