the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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