I'm jealous of your bromance
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize