I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
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