he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Randomize
