Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
