I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
