Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
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struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!