this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize