I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
