I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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