I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
