moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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