ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
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