I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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