Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
