Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
He had one of those small greek statue penises
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
