drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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