got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize